Which Super-Hero Would You Like to Employ in Your Garden

Silver Surfer

A member of the Fantastic Four, Silver Surfer can be a real help around the garden. His ability to analyze and manipulate matter and energy, and restructure or animate matter at will, even transmuting elements is extremely helpful when applied to your compost bins. A task that usually takes weeks, if not months, can be dealt with in a matter of minutes.

His ability to heal living things would also be of assistance with those struggling plants which just can't seem to shake soil-borne viruses. However, don't expect too much as Silver Surfer can't resurrect the dead.

Green Lantern

Green Lantern's ability to fly across the cosmos through wormholes could be very useful for the organic gardener. He will allow them to know what effect their gardening principles are having on the health of their soil and advise future options.

He is also proficient as a universal translator which can be nothing less than sheer miraculous as you try to decipher the small print on an imported packet of seeds.

The only downside to Green Lantern is that his strength comes from his green ring and we all know how dangerous it is to garden while wearing any type of jewellry - especially rings.

Batman

Batman, although disguised and hidden via a cape and mask, has no super-hero powers. Ultimately he's no different to the guys who hire his costume from a dress-up shop except that he is a whiz with all things scientific and harbours incredible detective skills.

These abilities would be an amazing help in diagnosing what pest just started eating your new foliage, what minerals your soil is now lacking and who pinched that last strawberry you planned to enjoy.

Wonder Woman

Born of the clay of Themyscira, Wonder Woman knows how hard it is to garden with impervious soils. Her abilities to heal, especially with things of the earth, would be an incredible wealth when trying to fight pests and soil-borne diseases.

Teaming her up with Batman would make common sense as Batman could diagnose the problems and Wonder Woman can repair them.

Invisible Man

The Invisible Man comes into a class of his own especially when showing visitors through your garden. He can still be working while your guests enjoy their tour and be quickly commanded ahead to remove a missed weed if need be.

Mr Incredible

Mr Incredible is known for his super-human strength and ability to benchpress locomotives. These abilities would come in very useful when landscaping is on the to-do list.

He could move boulders, dig through soil in a matter of moments, and transfer heavy bird baths without having to remove any fences to get him into your yard. While he's not as fast as his son, Dash, he's still no slow-poke so a job that would take you and a team of five guys a weekend to complete could be finished before morning tea.

Wolverine

Wolverine is widely acclaimed for his regenerative abilities. His power to quickly restore himself and other living things offers some exciting opportunities for those gardeners who suffer through snow-covered winters.

This super-hero power could be exercised to regenerate your garden months ahead of anyone else and increase the appearance of spring. No need to deadhead your annuals either as he can instantly restore them to their flowering glory.

Spiderman

For those who don't suffer from arachnophobia, Spiderman may come in very useful as a result of his abilities to cling to walls and move through your garden.

I can see that he would be very helpful in cleaning the gutters around the house, trimming large trees and generally being of assistance in hard to reach positions.

Spiderman is also gifted with night vision which may offer some help against possums, snails and other adversaries who take advantage of our gardens under the cover of darkness.

Magneto

Another X-Men character, Magneto is obviously handy for his ability to lift things of great weight but as we already have Mr Incredible on that job his power to control ferrous particles may be more useful.

No more rusty gardening tools, secateurs or wheelbarrows with Magneto hanging around. He can instantly revert all that destruction back to its prime condition. You wouldn't even need to put your tools away but could comfortably leave them where you were last working ready for you to come back and continue.

Obviously I've missed a wealth of superheroes including Superman, the Incredible Hulk, Cat-woman, Flash, Captain America and others. So, there may have been someone who you would prefer helping around your garden which we would love to hear about.

Which Superhero would you employ to work in your garden?

Posted by Stuart on August 8, 2007 7:07 AM | Permalink | Check to Subscribe to this Comment:

Comments

Definitely -- Spiderman! I like spiders a whole lot more than I like climbing up on a ladder, so it would be lovely if he could do the high-altitude chores for me. Pruning the apple orchard leaps to mind...

Posted by: Jen / domestika | August 8, 2007 8:25 AM

The Jolly Green Giant, of course. I can't believe he isn't on your list!

Posted by: Carol | August 8, 2007 8:55 AM

I totally dig both your choices Jen and Carol. I too am afraid of heights far more than I am of spiders (though I'm not scared of them at all, really!) so I would certainly find a use for Spiderman in my garden.

The Jolly Green Giant should have been a logical choice. You're right Carol, I can't believe I missed him out.

Posted by: Stuart | August 8, 2007 10:13 AM

For a minute there, I thought that was a photo of Captain Carlton, who has to be the lamest AFL mascot. I would much prefer one that makes the kids (and me) laugh, like the fluffy bird mascots, yeah, even magpies.

Posted by: Val | August 8, 2007 10:23 AM

You are so absolutely eccentric. I love it! I didn't grow up with comic books so, this is a little lost on me in terms of specific characters. But, if I were to create a super hero to help in the garden, it would be The Garden Stalker. See garden stalker put together is gardenstalker, so my super hero would be able to talk to plants, and the plants would be able to talk back, and ask for things like "More water please", or "Can I have some shade?" or "I have an iron deficiency!" Pretty cool eh? I wish that I could talk to plants. I simply love the question.

Posted by: Beth Lawrence | August 8, 2007 1:36 PM

Captain Carlton!!! You are so right Val. It's the only thing that makes me doubt supporting this football team. I'm glad he doesn't get a lot of air-time.

Beth - Seriously, that is THE best compliment I have ever had. I'm glad you thought this post was teetering on eccentricity as I had so much fun writing it. I was inspired from another post in another genre which was a little similar and so I developed the title over a couple days and relished the thought of finishing it.

I too would like my plants to talk to me. It would certainly make gardening a lot more enjoyable - that is until they started whingeing about the lack of attention they've been getting lately.

Posted by: Stuart | August 8, 2007 1:44 PM

Heh, I would definately opt for Silver Surfer, since he can double as a garden statuette when he's not at work (yes, when I get a 'real' garden I'd like it posh). The Joker would make an excellent garden gnome, as would the Penguin - but they are super villains and wouldn't stay put, so I think I'm content with the Surfer.

Posted by: Rosengeranium | August 8, 2007 4:10 PM

LOL! Great sense of humour there - I never would've thought of it myself, but I could sure use just about all of the ones you thougt of- Bravo!
Hey, is Aquaman only good in sea water? :)

Posted by: Lavender | August 8, 2007 6:13 PM

'fraid so Lavender. However, maybe he might be helpful in removing the salts from your soil!!

Rosengeranium -maybe you could swap Silver Surfer for the Iceman in winter?

Posted by: Stuart | August 8, 2007 10:25 PM

What a fun post, Stuart - and with my clay it would be logical to choose WonderWoman and perhaps ask Superman to use his Xray eyes to find out where I dropped the pruners or the Cape Cod Weeder.

Since it's so hard to squeeze large, clog-clad feet into the small spaces between plants, my garden sometimes looks as if I've been visited by the Hulk.

Annie at the Transplantable Rose

Posted by: Annie in Austin | August 9, 2007 12:05 AM

What a fun idea ! I would like a superhero that eats slugs and cabbage-white butterflies... well that would be a good old-fashioned, straightforward 'frog-man' wouldn't it?

Posted by: Matron | August 9, 2007 4:01 AM

Thank you Annie. I knew someone would find Wonder Woman's skills helpful. And now that you've mentioned Superman's xray vision I'm sure many gardeners reading this will knowingly smile at that point.

Matron - great idea with a 'frog-man'. I wonder if the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles might be into cleaning those up for you as well.

Posted by: Stuart | August 9, 2007 1:45 PM

Stuart, you included Wolverine but not Storm? Come on! Who else can water your garden and prune out dead branches from your trees at the same time? (For that matter, any sort of demo that could be accomplished by wind or tornado would be a snap for her!)

Also, he's not a proper superhero but sometimes I wish I had MacGuyver in my backyard. Oh, the things I have for him to fix... lol.

Posted by: Kim | August 10, 2007 12:55 AM

I have no excuse Kim as to missing out Storm. She would make perfect sense in our gardens.

BTW - MacGuyver would be pretty cool too. As you've already stated, he's not a superhero, but his use of gadgetry from the simplest of objects has to put him out there somewhere.

Posted by: Stuart | August 10, 2007 6:21 AM

If MacGuyver showed up in Kim's garden it might take them a long, long time to get around to fixing anything mechanical.

Annie

Posted by: Annie in Austin | August 10, 2007 9:03 AM

Annie, LOL! Okay, that too. *grin*

Posted by: Kim | August 13, 2007 6:10 AM

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